"Taylor Made Family"

A Season of Change

2011-09-29T13:27:00.000-07:00

Fall is such a season of change. Although the last few months of my life have been nothing but change. I am trying to embrace the change and roll with it instead of resent and fight it. I do have my days though when little bursts of emotions just have to work their way out...today is one of those days. I guess that is my way of "mourning" the loss of some of the unwanted changes that have occured. Today my heart is feeling very empty. There are so many horrible trials out there and my measly little trial is all really so meaningless but it is how I feel nontheless. My superficial, worldly complaints that are spinning in my head just need to get out of my brain. So...I miss my house. I miss my dear friends. I miss having my dear friends as dear neighbors. I miss my ward, soo much. I miss my closet. I miss my bathtub. I miss our yard. I miss our bridge. I miss my wood floors. I miss my fireplace. I miss MY KITCHEN. I miss having a fridge IN my "kitchen." I miss having a dishwasher. I miss having a stove and an oven in my kitchen. I miss parking in the garage. I miss my porch. I miss seeing the deer in my yard. I miss feeling in awe of the beauty of our neighborhood entrance every time I entered it. I miss running past the pond. BUT... I have been so blessed!!! I am so incredibly grateful for 5 healthy children that I love more than life itself! THAT IS SO HUGE! They keep me going and make me want to be a better person...help me to keep striving toward the divine potential that only Heavenly Father can really see in me. I am grateful for a good husband that works very hard to provide for our family. He is a very good man and has so many amazing strengths...and he is soo hot. he he. I am so grateful for my selfless parents who have once again opened their home up to the pure chaos we call a family. I am so grateful to have this time with my parents. I love them so much. I am so grateful my kids are having the chance to spend so much time with my parents. I am so grateful we have this open, spacious basement to stay in. I am so grateful our house sold so fast at a fair price. I am so grateful our 2nd car didn't die until after moved. I am so grateful we then had some money to replace it. I am so grateful Anthony has been so selfless and patient in driving that lil' beater for so many years. I am grateful that we found a house to buy that felt right and that we will eventually get to move into it. I am so grateful it is so close to the kids school. I am so grateful my kids are adjusting to the change. I am so grateful for the chance to have my prayers answered and to feel like I am moving forward according to THY will. I am so grateful for prayer. I am so grateful to have the spirit with me and to feel its guidance and direction. I am so grateful for the peace the temple gives me. I am so grateful for the Plan of Happiness. I am so grateful for a Heavenly Father who knows me better than I know myself and knows what I need to learn,endure and experience to mold this diamond in the rough that we all truly are. I am grateful for a husband with the same eternal perpective. I am grateful for extended family that loves us and supports us. I am grateful we "get to" start a new chapter in life right now...I know it will be a good one because I choose for it to be. AHHHHHH..ok, feel better now. Time to go get the kids from school. Love you all!

Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about dancing in the Rain! Or so I thought!

2011-04-11T14:01:00.001-07:00

Blake (age 5) has been needing some one on one lately..so the other day I took just Blake and headed out for a mommy date night. We started at the Dollar Store to get a prize Blake has earned for 10 smiles on his "Good Choice Chart. As we embarked on our adventure I promised myself to have Blake's kind of fun and think like a little boy...and to not constantly correct him all night. (Yes, I Can be a nag of a mom at times.) I took Blake's hand in the parking lot and we started to run into the store because it was raining pretty hard. As we ran we were approaching a very large puddle (much deeper than it appeared.) I had a random thought that we should "embrace the moment and jump in the puddle. Blake will love it...I'll be the coolest mommy." We were moving fast hand in hand and I quickly diverted us to the puddle in a step or two and with a huge double footed jump absolutely DRENCHED us. I laughed out loud and looked down at Blake with a huge smile..he looked like a little drowned rat dripping with muddy water. "MOMMMMM! AHHHHHH! WHY DID YOU DO THAT? LOOK AT MY CLOTHES! AHHH! MOMMM! AHHHH! I'M NOT GOING IN! AHHHHH...MOM!" I felt so bad..."No Blakey, it's fun, let's do it again!" "NOOOOO!" I explained, "I'm sorry, I thought it would be fun, I'm sorry honey!" It was very hard to even get him into the store now with his "waaay wet clothes!" I truly felt bad but the whole deal just had me stuffing my giggles deep down inside...so much for "dancing in the rain." he he Guess next time we"ll just make mud pies. ha ha

He's there

2011-02-02T23:24:00.000-08:00

2/2/11

About a month ago I started noticing a lot of random, quick, extremely intense pin - prick like pains throughout my body. I also started seeing spots in my vision and losing “chunks” of my sight some days. I commonly experienced “stars” in my vision and it was somewhat distressing but I didn’t mention it and brushed it off. Shortly before Christmas I started losing feeling in various parts of the left side of my body…especially my arm and leg. It would come and go but was growing more numb more frequently. Headaches were also starting to become a daily event. Not just an average headache but many that made it difficult to eat, sleep, and think clearly at times. I had a dull burning sensation in the front part of my head that was rarely leaving. Then about 2 weeks ago I had a pain in the top of my head that nearly dropped me to my knees. It was accompanied with a spinning sensation so strong that I couldn’t get my bearings straight as to which way was up or down for a few seconds. Probably only like 2-3 seconds but it felt like more. Had I been standing I am confident I would have fallen. Luckily I was laying down when it happened. I thought it was weird but it was over as soon as it had started so again I brushed it off. The next day I had the stabbing pain in my head 2 more times...both times causing me such intense pain, spinning and nauseas. Over the course of the next few days, the pains increased in frequency and intensity…always in the same spot on my head. Still I hadn’t mentioned them to Anthony. For the past 6-8 months or so I try to keep my mouth shut about the small stuff that we all experience from time to time in an attempt to be more positive and complain less. I also didn’t want to go pay another stupid co-pay. One night about 2 weeks ago as I was showering, the top of my head was so tender I had difficulty washing my hair. I noticed a large lump on top of head…it was at the site of the sharp pain I’ve been having. As I touched the lump on my head, the room began to spin. I told Anthony and explained what I had been experiencing. My left arm was tingling and felt “heavy” most days now. The skin on the top of my forearm and on the outside of my left leg were almost completely numb most days (not always though...it would come and go.) Do you know the feeling when you’ve had dental work and your face is numb and as it is “waking up” it feels cold to you and you can’t feel yourself touching your own skin? That is what it feels like...almost exactly. Well about a week and a half ago I had been on the phone with my sister Jami for quite sometime. I was listening with my right ear because I was having a hard time holding the phone with my left semi-numb arm. I noticed that my cell phone felt really hot on my right cheek. I switched the phone to my left cheek...nothing..can’t feel the hot phone. Hmm..I noted that seemed weird. Went on with my conversation and blew it off. I’m not sure if it was that day or the next but I was playing the “soft game” with Lucy and showing her how to softly touch others faces and not “baby slap” them as she gets excited and “clocks them one.” I held Lucy’s hand and we “softed” Boston’s face. I “softed” her face.” Lucy then “softed” my face. I COULD NOT feel it... not a thing! I felt a sick feeling in my gut as I realized the left side of my face was numb. Over the next few days, the feelings of numbness grew from lower left cheek up to my left eye. My left eye felt “weird” to blink and I was losing slight movement in the left side of my mouth. OK, at this point I felt sick inside and knew it was time (oh already! DUH!) to go see the dr. I set an appointment for the following week. I went to my appointment and explained my “laundry list” of symptoms. The doctor tiptoed around it for a few minutes then diplomatically explained me these were all the main red flag warnings of a brain tumor in thr right side of my brain...that seemed to be the main thing he focused on in the rest of our discussion. Oh that was so comforting to hear…ugh! Yes, you are detecting a hint of sarcasm! He wanted me to have an MRI to rule out 3 main things…a brain tumor, MS, or stroke. If it wasn’t those 3 things, he would then assume it was “neurological migraines”…different than typical migraines. He scheduled me for an MRI the very next morning and then for a series of blood tests for the following day. It is never a fun conversation to go home and explain to your husband that the doctor wants to do some tests but that the majority of my symptoms were pointing at a brain tumor. I was so happy that Anthony took the next morning off work to accompany me to my MRI. I was calm on the outside but my insides were freaking out. Just having Anth there really calmed me…he is my rock! The MRI was actually a very calm and peaceful experience. About 3 hours after my MRI I got a phone call from my doctors office. This surprised me because they had told me it would take approximately 48 hours to get any results. The nurse said they had received my results and the doctor wanted to meet with me in person at the office the next day. I requested to have my results given over the phone. She put me on hold and then returned to explain the doctor would rather discuss my results with me in person. Now if that doesn’t start your heart racing I don’t know what will…HOLY CRAP! SO then we got to spend the next 24 hours thinking and convincing ourselves that I didn’t have brain cancer. The feelings I felt are indescribable. I didn’t cry… I felt calm and at peace. But I really thought I was going to die from this. Every second felt so precious. I lay on the floor with the kids and just played with them. I kept repeating to them that I loved them, that I was so happy to be THEIR mommy. I didn’t answer the phone, I let them have as many treats as they wanted…and as many as I wanted too. We read book after book together. I left the dishes in the sink, let the laundry go undone. When Anthony got home, I just wanted him to hold me and not let go…ever! After the kids were in bed Anthony suggested we needed to go over a few of the “What if’s?” while our minds were clear and not super emotional like they may be if we are given an official diagnosis. During the course of the next few hours we discussed and planned…It felt more like planning “When” not “What if’s” anymore. Anthony wouldn’t normally be one to even discuss things of this nature so that in and of itself made things feel all too real. I realized as Anthony brought different matters up he had really put a lot of thought into this and was staring right down the barrel of losing me as much as I was. We discussed my wishes and our plans for Anthony re-marrying (I made him promise my “replacement” had to be uglier and fatter than me! Lol..totally joking..kinda! ha ha) I felt ill as I thought about the things I wanted to be here for that I’d miss. The baptisms, graduations, the boys passing the sacraments and getting the priesthood, first dates, first kisses, missions, marriages, grandbabies, and the list goes on. One of the thoughts that made me the sickest was the realization that I don’t have too many memories of MY life before I was 7 or 8 years old. Some, but not tons. Elsie is only 8. How much of me would they really even remember? I would be almost non-existent to the youngest 3 and a fleeting memory to the oldest 2. My heart felt so completely in love with my eternal companion and I couldn’t comprehend leaving his side. Even with all these overwhelming thoughts racing through my mind I felt peace. I felt an overwhelming sense of the spirit, of Heavenly Fathers hand in all things. I felt amazed that I felt a sense of comfort knowing that IF this was God’s will that I’d be ok with it. That thought and the comfort it brought me still surprises me but it also buoys my heart up. I KNOW THAT GOD LIVES. I KNOW THAT HE LOVES MY FAMILY AND ME AND WANTS US TO FIND JOY AND RETURN TO HIM SUCCESSFULLY … EVEN MORE THAN I WANT THAT. I REJOICE IN THE KNOWLEDGE (NOT THE HOPE BUT THE KNOWLEDGE) THAT I HAVE AN ETERNAL MARRIAGE…THAT I WILL BE WITH MY FAMILY FOREVER IF WE DO THE SIMPLE THINGS ASKED OF US! IF HIS WILL IS FOR ME TO RETURN NOW THEN I CAN HANDLE THAT. IS IT WHAT I WANT? NO…BUT I WANT HIS WILL MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE…FOR THAT IS THE WAY MY WHOLE FAMILY WILL BE TOGETHER FOREVER! THAT IS WHY THE GOSPEL PLAN IS CALLED “THE PLAN OF HAPPINESS!”
Wow, take a breath now. That sure got deep in a hurry! So… the long 24 hours did actually come to an end. I didn’t think those 24 hours would ever end …especially as I lay in bed at 1 am thinking about every little thing I’ve ever done as an “im-perfect” wife or mother. I got out of bed twice and checked on the kids as they slept. I just stood and starred at my precious sleeping babies. Listened to them breathe and pushed the lump in my throat down deeper. Prayed for Heavenly Father to take care of them to keep them safe and happy. The slight glow from Anthony’s alarm clock illuminated his sleeping silouette enough for me to see his shoulder move up and down slightly as he breathed. I thought about him laying in our bed all alone…or even worse with someone else. I thought about him struggling to be a single father to 5 little ones...to our babies. My head was whirling out of control from one random thought to the next with no cohesion at all. I thought about Lucy nursing and the need to quickly get her switched to a bottle. Who will watch to make sure Lucy doesn’t put something dangerous in her mouth? Who will make sure the bathroom door is closed to keep Lucy out of the toilet? Who will help the kids with their homework and set out their uniforms? Who will make sure Boston rides his bike on the sidewalk and looks both ways when he darts out in the road? Who will remind the kids to not reach their hands into holes out back because a rattle snake could be in there. (Yes… I know I need to get a grip) How will the girls get a training bra with their dad? Who will cut the boys hair? HOW WILL ANTHONY DO THE GIRLS HAIR? Terrifying thought! Lol) This sounds so silly now but I even decided in the middle of the night that I would indeed conduct interviews for my “replacement”…to help Anthony and the kids transition to the new mommy…it’s ok for her to sleep in the basement, right? (he he) I decided to make videos for each kid with me talking to them about every possible thing that will come up in their life. What exactly does Heavenly Father need me in Heaven for right now? Isn’t my job as a mother as important as anything on the other side of the veil? Who will meet me when I actually die? I wonder if Scott and my grandparents will “bring me on over?” I’m excited to see Scott and Aaron…and my grandparents. Will I be able to watch Anthony and the kids anytime I want? How can Jami be a twin without me? How can Ashley have a new baby amidst all this? I don’t want to take the focus of her special time with DeLaney. How will Mom and Dad handle losing a child? If this can all just go away, I’ll be the most patient mommy! I’ll never be short-tempered with Anth. I’ll be the most positive, up-beat, organized, person ever. I’ll live my life without regrets…without wishing myself into someone else’s shoes or never failing to recognize the simple things. Not waste time on idle things…things unworthy of every precious second meant to be spent on my loved ones. I spent the night bargaining with Heavenly Father that I’ll be all that and a ball of yarn if we can just be ok. But…then Anth’s alarm sounds. Time to get up, put on the happy face to not let on to the kids that anything out of the ordinary is going on.

Anthony met me at the doctor’s office for the results. It was obvious we were both expecting the worst as the Doctor entered the room. “Well Mandi, your brain scan looks great…all normal. NO MS, No signs of a stroke, and especially no Brain Tumors or masses of any kind!” I looked at Anthony. He was just staring at the Doctor in silence. I said, Wow…great!” I couldn’t seem to find any other words. I almost didn’t believe it. The words I had hoped we would hear were ringing in my ears. The doctor said, “You kinda freaked me out!” “Freaked YOU out? HELLO… YOU FREAKED ME OUT!” I told the Doctor. DUH! He explained I was having neurological migraines due to restricted blood flow in my brain. With some medication (that of course you can’t take when nursing) we should be able to get blood flow back to normal and stop all this stuff. Probably will need to take this pill everyday for a few years at least but who cares! HALLE-FREAKING-LUUUUIAH! Anthony and I left the office hand in hand and went on date..at 10 oclock in the morning. We sat in Subway and smiled at each other. My original birthdate is on 11/22. ( November 22) but today 2/2/11 (Feb 2, 2011) is the day I got my life back. I only lost it in my head for a few short hours…and I’m so glad I did. Sometimes it takes a good hard slap in the face to wake you up to what you really need and want in this life. I know the day will come when I will be called up but words cannot describe the joy I feel that Heavenly Father has granted me the time on earth to develop my fullest and divine potential…or at least attempt that. I love my Heavenly Father and I know with all my heart that He does in deed love me too.

Dance in the Rain

2011-01-19T08:52:00.000-08:00

I have so much to be grateful for. Sometimes I feel so inadequate for all that Heavenly Father has afforded me. I have been so humbled the last few months. I am more now than ever confident that Heavenly Father knows me, my hearts desires, my needs and my wants. We have witnessed miracles take place in our lives last month that literally left me speechless(and if you know me well..that is rare.;)We have been going through some trials that I will someday expand on but suffice it to say that I couldn't see a "fix." As I spent many hours in fasting and prayer I actually found myself more and more confused at the answers I was receiving. Continual feelings of "hold tight..the answer is coming...hold on and be patient...where do your treasures lie?...juld hold on and trust in me." Those were the repeated answers to my pleadings. I felt that the situation required something must happen immiediately, but that wasn't the guidance I received. So...I waited...and waited. Patience isn't my stongest virtue. Perhaps that was part of my lesson to be learned. The end is now in sight. I still don't know how things are going to comletely sort themselves out but things are starting to happen. Things I never even imagined could or would happen. Heavenly Father sooo sees the big picture and wants us to have joy. Sometimes I find myself caught up in convincing Heavenly Father that MY will COULD also be HIS will. Negotiating is not part of the Plan of Happiness. HE has already read my book and I am still in the preface. His small tender mercies are daily "Just Because" Love Notes to me. I am choosing to find joy in the little simple things in life. No more waiting for this or for that to feel content. Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass..it's about learning to dance in the rain. Sometimes we get so caught up in "controlling" things around us or trying to make everything perfect that we miss the tender mercies all around us. The beautiful gifts Heavenly Father is laying out before us..things that we may not even notice let alone thank Him for. Yesterday I went out on a cold, brisk walk. Just me, my red running shoes (that I love!)and my IPOD. I had planned on just a quick walk to the base of the Cove then home. As I hit the base it felt so invigorating...the cold air felt great in my lungs, the songs were calling to me to sing with them and put a spring in my step. The sunset was absolutely stunning! I actually HAD to stop and just stare at the pink clouds over the beautiful mountains. The way the sun was hitting the snow covered mountains...I couldn't stop staring. (I have a thing for sunsets anyways.) As I turned and headed towards the pond to complete my loop the setting seemed surreal..I felt like I was standing in my own little piece of Heaven. My thoughts didn't feel cloudy and jumbled, it was quiet and still and I KNEW Heavenly Father was indeed watching over his girl...over me! I felt a lump in my throat and wanted to shout out the joy I was feeling. This even sounds crazy but as I walked I could smell the nearby field of horses...it actually brought a smile to my face and made me think of my dad...he always loves the smell of manure...he has always breathed in a deep breath and said, "Ahhhh..it smells like home...He grew up a rancher. So, I've always LOVED that earthy-manure- outdoor smell from my Big strong Daddy.) I felt an overwhelming love for my parents...and peace for them and the current struggles they are facings. Sounds fairly silly now but I knew it was another tender mercy...a "Just Because" Love Note to me...the feelings of peace and love, the sunset, just the right songs on my IPOD, the sunset and yes, even the manure smells! My friends son was diagnosed last week with bone cancer...It has really shaken me up. I feel so amazing and grateful that Anthony and I have been blessed with 5 beautiful and completely healthy kids...I pray that continues. I pray for my friends son to be made whole if it by Thy will. Sitting on the outside looking in at the experiences my friends, my parents, siblings and in laws familes are going through. Heavenly Fathers hand is 200% there...IF we let it be. As I watch my own children learn and grow it pains my heart to let them struggle through things. Sometimes "free agency" really is lame...but it's the only way. The only way to fully learn, gorw and develop these diamonds in the rough called US! I am so happy to have the chance to prove myself worthy of this life..and that Heavnely Father is so merciful to let me have a "fresh start" each and every day. p.s. I LOVE YOU!

Lucy is 6 months old!

2010-10-29T15:09:00.000-07:00

I can't believe Miss Lucy Jane is 6 months old...actually almost 7 now! She is crawling, laughing and melting this lil' family's hearts. Everyone drops anything at a chance to hold Lucy. She giggles at funny faces, funny sounds and at almost anything Boston does. I can't even imagine how life would be if we had not had our little "cherry on top" Lucy. It's obvious she is has a very precious little spirit meant to be part of our family. I thank Heavenly father everyday for her safe arrival. She loves chocolate and to snuggle with mommy...my personal fave! (yes...she is 6 months old and loves chocolate...don't ask. Part of the fun of having older sibs that feed you stuff Mommy won't...lol) WE LOVE LUCY!

I'm going to be a LOSER!

2010-09-03T08:34:00.000-07:00

I am really excited. I am entering the Biggest Loser Fall 2010 contest. Contest runs September 1st to December 1st. (This is a local mom thing, not the real TV show)I'm going to lose these 20 pounds yet. I am going to track my progress on my blog and theirs. (http://biggestloserfall2010.blogspot.com/) I think being "accountable" will really help me. I will post my before pics asap. The first few things I am committing to are as follows:
~ Exercise 5 times a week...at least 3 of them MUST be cardio.
~ Drink 10 glasses of water a day.
~ Never eat after 7 pm.
~ Stay on calorie target

I BELIEVE IN ME! NOTHING TASTES AS GOOD AS BEING THIN FEELS!

Baby Countdown!

2010-04-05T09:51:00.000-07:00

Well it's absolutley amazing considering where we started to think that I am 38.5 weeks along in this pregnancy! The baby is looking great and mommy is 150% ready to be done. I have been contracting tons for a month now and have been sent home from the hospital once. We are currently dilated to a 5 and 80% effaced. SO... it can't be too long now! Worst case scenario the doc will induce on April 13. That of course feels so far away yet I know it isn't. We are still debating on the name but do have it narrowed down to 2. Either Ruby Jane Taylor or Lucy Jane Taylor. I love both names for different reasons. I am hoping to have a big moment of enlightenment when she is born that tells us what she should be named. ;) Stay tuned for baby updates and pics when she finally makes her big debute! I can't wait to hold you in my arms precious baby girl!

The Name Game!

2010-01-28T15:50:00.000-08:00

Ok, so we are so excited to be having a girl. (Our lil tie- breaker..3 girls and 2 boys - the FINAL score!) Although, now the naming challenge is in FULL SWING! Anth and I have very different taste in names. I gave him list of 35 names...35!!!! He put a "NO" on all but 3...and they were "maybe's." The 3 "maybe's" are Siciliy ,Annie, Olivia. My #1 and #2 picks are Lucy and Ruby. Anth hates both of them. His #1 pick is Charlie. It's cute, but not my favorite because of another girl named Charlie that I knew. Killed the name for me. Both of our other girls names are our Great grandma names so I would like to keep going with that but don't 100% love any of the other names we have to choose from. (1 of our "maybe's" is a great grandma,(Annie) but we can't come up with any other great grandma names so far.) Sorry great great great grandmas! I love you still though! I know this is silly but because the other 2 girls names end in the "E" sound, I want this one too...I know OCD! 11 weeks left to figure it out! Well, 11 weeks IF I go full term... never have in 4 other pregnancies, but we shall see.

21 weeks and counting Baby!

2009-12-03T16:47:00.000-08:00

Most of you know that I have had a tear in my placenta that started hemmorraging very badly and that I have been on bedrest for months now. (Very rough with 4 kids.) We have been told that there was a large possibility that we wouldn't be able to get far enough along to actually bring home a baby before the baby would lose the blood suppy and pass away. Also that there was a very large danger of me internally bleeding to death due to the size and severity of my hemmorage. That has been the largest reason for such strict restrictions. My doctor has been amazed that the baby has never seemed to be effected by the tear. (He has had patients w/ tears much smaller than mine already have their baby pass away.) That was a few months ago. We have recently had some very sacred experiences that once again confirmed and added to some other sacred experiences regarding this pregnancy and baby before I was pregnant and during the early stages. My doctor has told me that a tear this big doesn't heal. May I add...doesn't heal without a miracle or the power of Heavenly Father. A few weeks ago my Bishop showed up at our house very late one evening. He said he felt impressed that I needed a blessing that day. In my powerful blessing he promised me that my baby and myself would heal fully and "be made whole." The power of his words at the time struck me to the core. How truly inspired he was. From the very next day on, I have felt an amazing change physically and emotionally...for the better. My months of intense pain left that day and have never returned. Not to say I don't still have rough days, but nothing like before. Today at our ultrasound the u/s tech couldn't even find a hint of a tear, let alone a large tear or hemmorage...no residual internal bleeding either ( which we were told wouldn't go away once progressed to the point we were.) Everything with the baby looks perfect! I just laid on the u/s table and cried. The tender mercies and blessings we have experienced are just beyond explanation for me. I love my Heavenly Father so deeply and feel once again so indebted to Him.

THIS TOO SHALL PASS...

2009-10-12T13:10:00.000-07:00

So...pregnancy update. I have a torn placenta. If it stays at current state, all is good. If it tears more, baby loses blood supply...let's not even go there. So restricted everything...limited walking, stairs, bending , ..NO lifting anything... more than milk carton, pushing carts, vacuums, etc... only for 27 weeks! WHAT THE HECK!!! RRRRRRRRRRRR!!!! You've got to be kidding me.

Baby #5!

2009-09-11T08:18:00.000-07:00

Well, for those of you who don't know...drumroll please.... I am pregnant. This will be baby Taylor #5. So crazy! I feel a little foolish because I have been very vocal about the fact that "WE ARE DONE!" Well, after lots of prodding by the Spirit and fasting and prayers, we decided that someone else needs to be a part of our family. After we made the decision, I really got excited quickly about the prospects of a new baby. My gut really thinks this a little girl but who knows. It has been funny to start preparing because I had already gotten rid of all my maternity clothes, cribs, baby clothes, etc... So now we will begin the process again. It's all good. This pregnancy has been SO DIFFERENT than my other 4. I have been so very sick. Haven't been able to keep most anything down. Taking care of my 4 other kids and keeping life running smoothly without "Mommy's game face on" has been difficult. My visiting teachers, friends and family have been so helpful. We have had so many meals brought in, house cleaned by friends, shoulders to cry on, etc.... I can't thank you enough... you know who you are. It's been interesting... When you are that sick for that long you really see who your true friends are. Love you guys! I can't thank you enough!

BLUE THUNDER SOCCER

2009-06-12T17:22:00.000-07:00

Soccer has been so much fun this year. Lillie really enjoyed playing. By the time Soccer ended, she was actually quite a good player. Because I have never had a brother and have had almost NO experience with sports (other than dancing or cheering at the games) it was a new experience for me. Anthony was the Coach and did an awesome job. I was so impressed with him as a Coach. Whenever Lillie scored a goal and ran to him for a hug, it made me totally choke up. (Although I know it is totally NOT COOL to cry at soccer! Another soccer Dad explained that to me. LOL) The kids just adored him and he adored them. They were the cutest little unified team. I didn't know I could get that excited over a bunch of 5 year olds fighting over a ball. So cute! Everytime Lillie got a goal, the whole family earned milkshakes. Needless to say, when Lillie scored, we all scored! Go Lu Lu! What a team player! Here are a few pictures of the season and the final game's "Medal Ceremony"... I use the word 'ceremony' loosley. GO BLUE THUNDER!!!

BLUE THUNDER SOCCER 2009

2009-06-12T17:11:00.000-07:00

ADA Dance Recital

2009-06-12T16:20:00.000-07:00

Dance is over for the Summer. The girls just completed their 2nd year with ADA Dance Studio. Elsie and Lillie are becoming great little dancers. Every time they walk out on the stage, I can't help but cry. The girls have gotten to be little dance buddies with Heidi Dowdle's girls, Baylee and Brinlee. I have loved getting to visit with Heidi every Friday. She is one of my longest and dearest friends. We've been close for going on 20 years. Wow, are we really that old? I also really liked the teachers at ADA. Best of all... 10 minutes frome home! Sure beats the 35 minute 1 way commute to Taylor Studios in the past.

ADA Dance Year End Show

2009-06-12T16:17:00.000-07:00

Summer is Finally Here!!!! Time to Party!

2009-06-12T15:06:00.000-07:00

School's Out!!! Yahoo! I love having the kids home during the day! When Elsie and Lillie are at school, I count the hours until they come home. I really miss them when they are gone. Elsie starting a full day of first grade last fall killed me. Lillie has just been at pre-school for 2 1/2 hours on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. In the Fall, she will join Elsie at Providence Hall for Kindergarten... everyday. (sniff sniff) I am so glad she will still be half days. Blake will start pre-school in the Fall and take on Lillie's old pre-school schedule. So for 2 1/2 hours, 3 days a week, it will be just me and Boston. So crazy! I guess that is a draw-back of having 4 kids in 4 1/2 years. They all leave you quickly...one after the other. Time for another baby! JUST KIDDING! Time for a...a...a... NAP! Yahoo!

When I picked up carpool today for the last day of the school year, I couldn't believe the year was over. Feels like we just started the school year. All the kids piled out of the school and I was waiting for an audible cheer or something. Nothing came. I remember when school let out as a kid, students running and cheering, spraying each other with shaving cream and throwing confetti. I saw none of that, just looked like a normal pick up. Rows of SUV's and Mini-vans with worn-out Mom's at the wheel. (Usually on the phone ...undoubtedly arranging some sort of a soccer/piano/dance/karate class.) I felt we quickly needed some "Celebration-ness". As soon as my car was filled with 5 little ones I announced it was Party time! Who wants a Slurpee??? "What's a Slurpee Mom?" What the Heck? I am once again dating myself back to the slurpee days at the "Sev." I mean, "Who wants an Icee?" Finally, some cheers! Chevron was not prepared for our parade of 6 but they handled with style. Go Chevron! Time for some serious Summer Fun Baby!

Taylorsville High School 15 Year Reunion

2009-04-30T08:53:00.000-07:00

For any T-ville Warriors out there. I've been having lots of fun helping with the 15 year reunion. It is set for August 1, 2009. We are having 2 events. Go to the reunion blog for all the info. Help spread the word.

ths1994blogspotcom.blogspot.com

"Expressions Vinyl Lettering is back"

2009-04-12T19:37:00.000-07:00

I have had lots of people wondering after my Easter Bucket offer if they can order vinyl again. Answer is yes. I am starting to take a LIMITED number of orders. If you are needing something, give me a call and I'll hook you up!
801-520-6070

APRIL FOOLS DAY!!!

2009-04-02T10:01:00.001-07:00

So April 1st arrived just like every year, without me realizing it. One of these years Anthony's ever-so-trusting wife is going to wise up to his evil schemes. At about 7:30 a.m., I receive the following text. "Stay by phone...I am OK but was just rear ended on freeway...civic is not ok." Of course one of my worst fears, car accidents combined with my fear of losing Anth...NOT GOOD! I was immediately shaking and very concerned. Knowing Anthony, I was afraid that he was indeed hurt but didn't want to freak me out. I tried to call him and no answer. I'm now feeling the lump in my throat grow - All part of his evil plan. Shortly after he finally calls me back... he then has to calm his quivering voiced, shaky kneed wife with tons of :"I"m OK's". "The civic is probably totaled and I'm going to need you to come get me. I am going to have the car towed, you can get me there." During all of this, I am trying to get Elsie and Lillie ready to go to school. After the initial phone call I had gathered the kids, explained Daddy was in an accident but he was ok. We then all knelt and prayed together to thank Heavenly Father for protecting Anthony. (Supposedly the people in the "other car" were seriously "banged up" but he had the paramedics check out his shin from a good bang and he was fine.) Elsie and Lillie (ages 6 an d 5) were both obviously fighting back tears and begging to not go to school until we got daddy back home. They were very concerned about daddy being in an ambulance. They were so scared. Blake (age 3) kept asking if daddy was going to die. Boston (age 2) ummm... where is Boston anyways? SO... now I start trying to quickly arrange for various carpools, scout leader meetings, people to take the younger kids... etc... All scheduled to take place within the next few hours. Again, the phone rings, Anthony is on the other end. On my end all I can think is, "I love you, I love you, I love you, I'm so glad you are ok." I just wanted to hold him. He explains that the police officer offered to drop him off here at home so I wouldn’t have to go get him. Here's the part that kills me - yes, I actually fell for it, but he was so convincing! (I know, so disturbing on many levels.) The police officer was heading to a helicopter-training thing and was going to drop him off out here in Herriman at our house via Helicopter. DUH!!!! Anth starts laughing so hard and tells me to open the window so he could crawl down from roof after they drop him off. He is laughing so hard I can hardly understand him. I even actually looked outside for a helicopter. Anth then says, he'll be swinging down on a rope. Suddenly it was all ever so clear! IT IS APRIL FOOLS DAY!" SO NOW THE ANGER AND TEARS ALL SURFACE... "YOU ARE SO MEAN... NOT FUNNY! NOT FUNNY AT ALL!!!" WERE YOU EVEN IN AN ACCIDENT?" All I can hear is hysterical laughter and a quick , "Nope." Then I'm embarrassed to say I hung up on him. I was shaking like a leaf. Get a grip Mandi you big sponge! (By the way...that is a self-proclaimed sponge. Anth didn't call me a sponge.) I explained to the kids that daddy was joking because it was April Fools Day. Elsie seemed confused why he did it as she headed off to carpool within seconds of learning of daddy's "joke." Lillie folded her arms quickly, and with a Humph and a big frown declared. “That is NOT funny. I was scared." (I readily agreed with her.) Blake said, "Daddy told a liar!" And Boston ... well he was oblivious to everything & was found in my bathroom destroying and "washing" most of my makeup and filling a flower vase on my counter top with lotion. NOW.... All I can say is this:

"MY DEAREST LOVE, DON'T TURN YOUR BACK. FOR WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT, SWEET SWEET REVENGE WILL BE MINE!"

Love,
Your innocent lil' wifey poo,
Mandi

I'VE BEEN TAGGED!

2009-03-31T07:37:00.000-07:00

I've been Tagged!

My awesome sis-in-law, Amanda Taylor "tagged" me and gave me these rules and categories to fill in. FUN! Here it goes! Some new insights to our fam.

The rules:
1. List three items in each category (JOYS, FEARS, GOALS)
2. Tag three other people you would like to hear from
3. Get to know your friends and family

JOYS...This one is easy!

1. First off would have to be Anthony. We have been married almost 11 years now. Oh, how time flies. We have been through so much in those short 11 years and have a very deep love to show for it. I know Anthony loves me. He works so hard to provide for our family. He is so disciplined in EVERYTHING he does. He amazes me. He makes me want to be a better person. I love him so much and I am so grateful for him and for our committment to eternity...together. Some of my favorite times with Anth are when we are laughing and snuggling while we watch a movie. I love you ANTH!

2. Definitely has to be my kids. Oh boy, I've got joy! I can't believe how much satisfaction my lil' family brings me. I revel daily at my kids... not in a prideful way. I'm just amazed at the strength of their spirits in the Latter Days. Even at my little ones ages, 6, 5, 3 1/2 and 2, I see the valiant spirits Heavenly Father has sent to us. I think all the kids and youth in these times are that way. Wow! What an amazing honor and responsibility is ours as parents of these "Saturdays Warriors." Gosh, I love my 4 precious lil' Taylor tots so much it hurts sometimes! Sounds so cheesey but here it comes... "They complete me!"

3. Here somes the "Sunday School answer"... can't avoid it though. It is the deepest, truest part of my being. My love and knowledge of my Savior and Father in Heaven. I can't imagine what my life would be like without the gospel. It brings such peace and real joy to me... not temporary happiness, but joy that fills my whole soul. I can't picture raising my children without the standards and truthfulness of the Plan of Salvation. It is the perfect plan. One that could only be created by a most loving and merciful Father. I know Jesus Christ is MY redemmer and through his gospel I can have "No empty Chairs" at my table. FAITH~FAMILY~FOREVER

FEARS

MANDI'S DISCLAIMER:
Ok, anyone who even remotely knows me knows I am a worrier. So fears are something I have plenty of (Unfortunately... true. I'm working on it though.)

1. I have a horrible fear of my kids being hit by cars. (Or to lose them in any other way I guess.)Not sure why, maybe because of my high school best friend had his little brother hit by a car and killed. OR...Maybe it was from this horrible show I watched as a kid of a hit and run. (I still get images in my head from that show.) When I have my kids with me (99.9% of the time) I'm a nervous wreck in parking lots, crossing roads, riding bikes, etc. I'm so afraid they will wander out in front of a car. Makes me feel physically ill to even think about it. (Hold my hand, everyone hold hands, don't leg go... DON'T LET GOOOO!) I know it drives Anthony nuts, but I...I...I... can't help it. It is also accompanied by a strong fear of car accidents. Oh it gives me the shivers. I think about it every time I am in the car. Probably makes me a very cautious driver, but it also gives me a stomach ache. It drives Anth crazy too. Sorry Honey, you married a weirdo;)

2. SNAKES! Can't say it enough! SNAKES, SNAKES, SNAKES. Little, big, gardner, water, rattler..all of the above. We have been in our new home in The Cove for about 2 months now. DON'T ASK ME WHY THIS DIDN'T OCCUR TO ME BEFORE, BUT THERE IS A STUPID (YET BEAUTIFUL) MOUNTAIN IN MY BACKYARD!!! HELLO!!! MOUNTAIN...UTAH...HOT, DRY DESERT...RATTLE SNAKES...UNFINISHED BACKYARD...LOTS OF BIG ROCKS FOR THEM TO HIDE... YOUNG, UNAWARE, CURIOUS KIDS!!!! AHHHHHHHHHH...CAN'T BREATHE! Ok...deep breath, calm, calm, calm. This fear was just intensified by learning that our friends and neighbors, The Carlsons found a baby rattlesnake in their gargage. I was also informed that the babies are the most venomous because they can not yet control the amount of venom they give you. Those giving little buggars just give you all they've got. Oh, I think I need to lay down, I'm getting dizzy. CAN WE SAY IRRATIONAL FEAR? BUT IS IT REALLY THAT IRRATIONAL. My point exactly! UGH!

3. Third fear, losing Anthony. I really fear Anthony dying and leaving me alone. (Especially worry about him dying in a car accident.) I feel at peace knowing that we are sealed, but feel terrified at the thought of living OUR mortal life without HIM. I have played it out so many times in my mind. What would I do? I've learned from my mother-in-law that life does go on. You can find happiness again and that you can make it, but it still scares me.

Well, well, well. I have just re-read my FEAR section. I really sound un-stable. Yikes! I really am a stable and level-headed person. Maybe I need to find myself a good therapist. Sounds like a I may have a few "issues" to work though. Ha ha! Just kidding. I can't because I am afraid of therapists... just kidding. That was funny! I am totally laughing at my own joke! A good one at that!

TAG, YOU'RE IT!

ASHLEY BENNION
MONICA DUPAIX
HEIDI DOWDLE
BROOKE KEDDINGTON

Christmas Newsletter

2008-12-11T09:07:00.000-08:00

CHRISTMAS 2008

Wow, what a year 2008 has been. It started with us living in Herriman. I am firm in my belief that we had the best neighbors and ward possible. (Sulky Cove is a little slice of Heaven!) I know I am a little biased - I had the opportunity to serve as the Relief Society President and I have never had such an awesome experience when serving my Father in Heaven. It made me develop such a love for the families in our ward. Well despite our love for our friends and ward, we felt something pulling us elsewhere. Where? That - we are still not sure. We decided to test our the market and BOOM! We sold our little home in less than one month at full price. So now what? We moved in with my very giving parents in July. Yes, all 6 of us. My lil' sisters family is also living there while her husband is in school. Bringing the Nebel household total to 11. Keep in mind that 45% of the residents are under the age of 6. ( P.S. Mom: Mr. Hogle called... he wants his Zoo back!)

So after months of searching for just the right house and multiple failed offers on multiple houses, here we are! Although, we are excited to spend Christmas at Grandma Judy's and Grandpa Lon's. I PRAY that January will find us in our own home again. We can't thank my family enough for opening their home and hearts to us for so long.

Anthony has still been very involved in his Triathalons. He has a light about him when he is in that arena. The cold weather has definitely hindered his workouts, but we both still get lots of activity chasing our 4 little ones! With 4 kids all born within 4 1/2 years, things are rarely boring around here. I LOVE being a mom! Anthony loves being a dad! He is an amazing daddy! The kids flock to him when he gets home everyday. Parenting is the most rewarding thing I've ever done. Don't get me wrong, it's not a cake walk - but there is no other way on earth that I would rather be investing my time, energy and love in. You can read all about 4 awesome monkeys at the top of the blog.

Anthony and I have recently achieved a new level in our marriage. Our marriage has always been really good, but is now absolutely unbelievable. He is my knight in shining armor and all I have ever dreamed of. He has been my best friend for the last 11 years, and will be forever! When he walks in the door, he gives my butterflies in my tummy! I love you Anth!

I think if I had sum up 2008 in one word, it would be "Growth." This year has been filled with so much change, some good and some bad. Yet through all of it, looking back I see the Lords hand in it all. Oh my goodness, the Lord works in mysterious ways. The blessings poured out on us are so humbling. I feel so inadequate and pray that each and every day we can attempt to live up to even part of what we have been given. All of our family and friends have been supportive and loving. The gratitude I feel for you all in indescribable. Thank you, Thank you , Thank you.

Anthony and I wish you all a very Merry Christmas filled with the Light of Christ and a happy and loving New Year!

P.S. I will keep the "house hunt" updates on our blog!

Love,

Anthony, Mandi, Elsie, Lillie, Blake and Boston

The Taylors

2008-11-29T10:57:00.000-08:00

Yes, our kids can fly!

An Attitude of Gratitude

2008-11-26T15:39:00.000-08:00

I have been thinking about what I am thankful for this Thanksgiving. I think the list could go on and on...but here are some of my tops.

My absolute surety of my Heavenly Fathers influence in my life and personal realationship with MY Savior.
The BEST husband ever... seriously, we've been through a lot and I can honestly say I am happier than I have ever been in almost 11 years of marriage. I love you eternally Anth!
The best 4 kids ever. You make my life so happy! I love being your mom!
I'm so grateful to have among my best friends: My parents, my siblings and their spouses, as well as Anthony's parents and siblings! Doesn't get any better!!! I love you all so much! FAITH~FAMILY~FOREVER
Even though we are STILL searching for our new home, I am so grateful that we do have the ability to buy a new home...and for my parents for opening their home to all 6 of us after our home sold so quickly! It's a zoo here... but we love it!
And... last but not least. I am grateful for my new shoes and red purse I received for my birthday! They are sooo cute!

2008-10-26T17:35:00.000-07:00

"Lillie's Run in With the Law"

Lillie (age 5) recently decided that seatbelts are for the birds. So one day last week when she was very resistant to being in her buckle, Mommy just happened to see a police car parked in a near-by parking lot. I pulled over, with a very nervous little 5 year old saying, Mom, what are you doing? Mom? Mommmmmmmm??? WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? I calmly said let's see if this officer will help "us" unerstand the importance of seatbelts. I pulled in, parked and walked over to him. (Personally, I think I made the Police Officer more nervous than Lillie.) I light-heartedly explained "our" dilemma to him and asked if he could help her "get it." I reminded him to not scare her, just impress upon her the danger, the law, etc... He did a great job, but Lillie would not even look at him, talk to him, and at the end, even yelled at him! Yikes! "I KNOW!!!!" He just laughed and walked away with a wish of good luck! Oh, OK THANKS! Guess what Family Home Evening was about that night? Obeying parents, the law, etc... Well, it seems to have made the difference. Lillie is now usually the first or second buckled and "ratting out who ever is doddling at the task at hand.

"Our Taylor-Tots"

2008-10-26T15:20:00.001-07:00

Elsie is our oldest. She is 6 years old and an ablsolute angel. Not to say she doesn't get into her fair share of mischief, but she is down right tenderhearted and caring. Our little blonde haired, blue eyed girl. ELSIE'S MOTTO: "EVERYTHING GOOD IN LIFE, IS PINK AND SPARKLES." Elsie is very smart and a very deep little thinker for her age. Questions from Elsie often provoke very interesting conversations for our lil' family. She also loves to dance and is a great student, but is strongly campaigning for changing school days for 1st graders to half days because it feels like "188 hours long!" I love her so much!

Lillie is our 2nd Taylor Tot. Lillie is our dark haired, dark eyed spit-fire. Lillie is a fiesty lil' thang. She is very passionate and determined at everything she does. When Lillie sets her mind to something, nothing is going to stop her. Not mom, dad, brothers, sister, police officers, nobody! (See "Lillies's run in with the Law" post to hear about Lillie's encounter with the South Jordan police.) Lillie is also a "girly girl" and always is accompanied by her "stuff." Quite often Lillie has 3 or 4 dolls, a purse, handfulls of odds and end papers, and is usually hiding someone else toys in her entourage of treasures. She cracks me up. Lillie is so concerned about others and nurtures and cuddles everything she has...even her brothers cars. (Much to her brothers dismay!) Oh, how I love Lillie's cuddles. Lillie is also our Taylor Singer. So far I would vote Lillie most likely to follow in her daddy's musical footsteps. She loves to make up songs and belt them out at the top of her lungs, anywhere we are. Carpool, grocery store, even sacrament meeting! Sorry Bishop Simpson!) Lillie, I love you!

Blake is a miniature Anthony to a "T". Everytime Grandma Sandy is with Blake she can't get over the mini-Anth. He is our bright blonde, blue eyed little man. Blake has so much personality in his three year old little body. He is always picking up on the funniest little catch phrases. His latest that Grandpa Lon taught him and he loves to say is "I stand all amazed!" He is very athletic and is grandpa's and daddy's little buddies. He loves to build things, fix things, break open things and just generally be a boy. His favorites of all his toys right now are his "Tow-mater" car, his flashlight and key ring full of keys from Grandpa. (He tries to open every lock he sees with his keys. ( At the Wheeler Farm a few weeks ago with the Taylor cousins, he tried to "Free" every animal at the farm with his keys. Luckily nothing was freed, except Blake and Tyce. His adorable cousin and partner in crime that day. I think we had to search for those 2 at least 3 or 4 times that day!) Blake is so awesome! I love him so much!

Boston is our little baby, but isn't too little anymore. (Sniff, sniff) Boston was our 5 week early teeny tiny premature baby who is now 19 months old and solid as a ROCK! He is hilarious! Oh boy, does he have a set of lungs! With 4 kids all within 4 1/2 years of each other, he has had to learn quickly to let others know what he wants... He's chosen a shrill scream as his form of, "Boston needs something!" That is one we are definitley working on diligently. Once again, Sorry Bishop as well as every one living under our roof! Boston also loves to snuggle under the covers with his sipper cup. Usually with Grandma or Mommy! I am predicting that Boston will at some point climb some amazing mountain because I swear that is all he does at home....climb. My moms baby grand piano has the footprints on top to prove it! He has the most infectious giggle and it makes me want to wrestle with hime and tickle him constantly. He adores Elsie and Lillie and searches for them while they are gone at pre-school and the Charter school. He is also, like Lillie... another dark eyed mommy look alike. I love you Baby Boston!

Let's Get This Thang Started...CATCHIN' YA UP!

2008-10-23T16:55:00.000-07:00

Well, I have officially joined the world of Blogging. That's BLOGGING, NOT CLOGGING. (That must stay in the past...way in the past...Yeeeehhhaaa!) We have so many of our family members out of state that I thought this would help us all stay connected. And... this is the closest I am going to get to journaling, at least until I have a few more kids in school. So, here goes nothing.

Here is the background story to catch ya'll up-to-date with our family. The last 6 months of our lives would best be described as "IN LIMBO." We had been living in Herriman, Utah for the last 4 1/2 years and loved every minute of it. In July we sold our house in order to move up into a bigger house for our quickly expanding family. Our house sold surprisingly super fast in this crazy market. When it was time to move we had not found a home, so...we moved in with my mom and dad in Riverton. My parents had a spare room and so graciously offered it. Yes, all 6 of us... in 1 room. Luckily, the girls are now sleeping downstairs in a spare room with Ashley & Brant (my lil' sister, Ashley, her hubby and baby also live downstairs while they are in college.) The girls share a bed and look so cute all snuggled together in the morning. You are probably thinking, "Hello it is now mid October and you haven't been able to find a home in almost 4 months." Let me just say the foreclosure/short sale market in Herriman right now is INSANE!!! We have had multiple offers on multilpe homes, and still ZIP, ZILCH, NADA!!!! But, I feel very at peace with Heavenly Father putting our home in our lap when the circumstances are right. Until then, I am SO grateful for the continual patience of my family. Although, I will be so excited, to once again have my fridge in the house and my clothes out of the garage. The changing weather is making changing clothes a wee bit chilly! BRRRRR! (Not to mention Anthony's and the kids new game of hitting the 'up button' on the garage door and locking the door when mom is changing clothes. Ha Ha... it was funny maybe the first 3 times. Now, VERY OLD GUYS!!!!

***WHAT IS THE BEST PERK TO LIVING WITH 3 FAMILIES UNDER ONE ROOF? 11 PEOPLE TOTAL HEAD COUNT...Mulitple women to help with chores, kids and cooking! (Whose turn is it to cook, anyways?)